Friday, September 11, 2015
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
WHAT HAS BECOME OF MY FIRST PARADISE? my life story...
PARADISE? Believe me, it still exists! I spent 11 beautiful years of my life in 'MY PARADISE'. What other people may see as a disadvantage, to me I saw it as a privilege. Growing-up in a place far away from civilization, far from city noice, pollution, a place where not even the tides could reach! No electricity, no cars, no television sets, no refrigerators, it's where I spent my childhood till I was 11. Life in my first paradise was really simple, every single family doesn't have to worry about necessities. They always have more than enough for their needs. All households has their own pieces of lands as their source for their bounty. Children spent their childhood happy with all the joys a child could ask for and that includes me! The simple joys of playing native games, catching butterflies, dragonflies and even coconut beetles and other insects and worms during the day, chasing fireflies, dancing, playing and singing in the moonlight are embedded in my memory that I won't trade for anything else. Oh, this is my elementary school years, I also had a little share of hardships in my paradise but those were extreme exceptional situations where being the eldest among 4 siblings I had to help in looking for that daily bread to sustain us when my father got sick for 1 year that he could not do farm works. No regrets though because those situations molded me to be the tougher stuff I am now. Other than those challenging situations, life is perfect in MY PARADISE, until...
1975, strangers from the eastern part of the province claimimg to be heroes and denouncing the kind of government at that time started coming in groups, declairing equality and progress if only everybody cooperates. So, the peace loving, simple minded people was little by little being brained washed at gunpoint and are even asked to support the 'bandits' needs by giving portions of their bounty. They claimed to be the armed force New People's Army. Not many of the people in MY PARADISE was able to reach high school, after finishing elementary grades not even 10% of the graduates would proceed to high school, so what do you expect, with little education, these people were gullible, even at the expense of their family's safety because young kids are being required now to join the armed group with those beautiful promises...in short, MY PARADISE now has become a bandit's haven. All these started on my first year in high school, eveything has been turned upside down, the peace has been replaced with fear for everyone's life, there was kidnapping and killings of people whom they suspect opposes their ideals, convicting, sentencing death without trial, but it reached the authorities of course and as a military measure, MY PARADISE was declared a 'no man's land for sometime...
1976 when my entire family needed to leave MY PARADISE to seek refuge in a nearby place, in a logging concession where we met people from different parts of the country. Naturally being refugees in a place where we don't have anything except ourselves, each of us needed to help, I was in second year high school and I don't want to stop schooling, gosh I had to do jobs you couldn't imagine a small 12 year old girl could do, the other 2 siblings I have would not also want to stop school. God is good all the time, HE sustained us physically, emotionally, mentally and provided us opportunities equal to our abilities. It's a melting point for every family member, the nice thing was, we were happy all throughout those trying years! The situation though robbed us the luxury of getting nice clothes, to hang out with friends after school but that also taught us the value of labor and time. We also needed to excel at school and we always end up with honors, against all odds.
Odd as it may seem but I am so thankful we got to that place and despite the hardships I refer the place as my PARADISE NUMBER 2....
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
TIME...it's mystery
Whew! It's been over 3 decades from the last time I saw him in flesh but the memory of his not so sweet smile still lingers. The impression of him that I carried on for decades never changed. Had acquaintances with him but those were all blank stare encounters. He was the snobbish shy guy type but excels at sports and in Military Training. He was one year my junior.
High School graduation came and everybody parted ways right after, never heard anything about him or his siblings, though one happened to be my classmate and a close friend. Thoughts of him sometimes surfaces but fades right away. I knew he's got a life same way that I got mine too! I knew he never laid an eye on me, not ever. I was the most petite in the class and everybody treats me as a kid sister.
Now after 3 decades and 3 years, with 3 serious relationships, 1 marriage with 2 kids and now a widow, what would you expect? Of course a lot of things has happened in my life, had my share of failures and successes. Traveled some interesting countries, bought a small house on mortgage, at 45 got a college degree while working. I would say I'm content with my life, but not until...
I took a week's vacation to the place where I finished high school, and on that 24 hour bus ride the memories just flowed uncut, some appeared blurred, some were just fragments, some were still clear but the clearest of them all was 'his' face, that stupid shy smile that you'll hardly notice cause he would not even show his teeth, grrrr...gosh, I vividly saw his face but thoughts of him just faded when the vacation was over. The next visit took place a year after and I again went through the same ordeal of seeing him vividly in my mind, same thing happened when the visit was over, it's back to reality.
But TIME has it's own way, mysteries can happen without you knowing it. On May 13, 2012 at 3:15pm
We became Facebook friends. Yes, me and the man of my dreams. How did it happened? The two vacation instances I took, inspired me to investigate if there is any group of high school alumni existing and I found out that there was none, so with the tools readily at hand like Facebook, I decided to create our alumni group page on January 10 2012, noticed how long it took me searching in Facebook before I finally found him? Four months!
I was so happy when we became friends on Facebook, was just so excited to see him, talk to him...but I found out that he was based overseas, arghhh! Another disappointment? but what the heck...technology is everywhere, the only wish I got now is to see him online, why not? I thought. A day passed without seeing him but it was on the third day that he said we may see each other via skype, and indeed surprise of all surprises the subject of my long search was now right in front of me in flesh, virtually though. I discovered many things about him, he was the shy type guy no more, for he is so conversational now. After that first online chat, I kept asking myself if it was really him, I knew it was him cause he even gave me his sister's phone number my batch mate and had a short chit-chat over the phone. I was so amazed how 'time' was able to reinvent him far different from what I was expecting.
We've been chatting almost everyday, we have great families, he has personally changed for the better, a 360° turn around from the shy guy that he once was, I can now hear him talk, see his teeth when he smiles and laugh, heard him sing, even saw him dance. I'm proud to say that I am so pleased to have found a long lost love plus i came to know a new one. I love both the old and the new. Is it TIME that made all my dreams into a reality, maybe? But I believe it is because TIME...has it's mystery...
^nina^
High School graduation came and everybody parted ways right after, never heard anything about him or his siblings, though one happened to be my classmate and a close friend. Thoughts of him sometimes surfaces but fades right away. I knew he's got a life same way that I got mine too! I knew he never laid an eye on me, not ever. I was the most petite in the class and everybody treats me as a kid sister.
Now after 3 decades and 3 years, with 3 serious relationships, 1 marriage with 2 kids and now a widow, what would you expect? Of course a lot of things has happened in my life, had my share of failures and successes. Traveled some interesting countries, bought a small house on mortgage, at 45 got a college degree while working. I would say I'm content with my life, but not until...
I took a week's vacation to the place where I finished high school, and on that 24 hour bus ride the memories just flowed uncut, some appeared blurred, some were just fragments, some were still clear but the clearest of them all was 'his' face, that stupid shy smile that you'll hardly notice cause he would not even show his teeth, grrrr...gosh, I vividly saw his face but thoughts of him just faded when the vacation was over. The next visit took place a year after and I again went through the same ordeal of seeing him vividly in my mind, same thing happened when the visit was over, it's back to reality.
But TIME has it's own way, mysteries can happen without you knowing it. On May 13, 2012 at 3:15pm
We became Facebook friends. Yes, me and the man of my dreams. How did it happened? The two vacation instances I took, inspired me to investigate if there is any group of high school alumni existing and I found out that there was none, so with the tools readily at hand like Facebook, I decided to create our alumni group page on January 10 2012, noticed how long it took me searching in Facebook before I finally found him? Four months!
I was so happy when we became friends on Facebook, was just so excited to see him, talk to him...but I found out that he was based overseas, arghhh! Another disappointment? but what the heck...technology is everywhere, the only wish I got now is to see him online, why not? I thought. A day passed without seeing him but it was on the third day that he said we may see each other via skype, and indeed surprise of all surprises the subject of my long search was now right in front of me in flesh, virtually though. I discovered many things about him, he was the shy type guy no more, for he is so conversational now. After that first online chat, I kept asking myself if it was really him, I knew it was him cause he even gave me his sister's phone number my batch mate and had a short chit-chat over the phone. I was so amazed how 'time' was able to reinvent him far different from what I was expecting.
We've been chatting almost everyday, we have great families, he has personally changed for the better, a 360° turn around from the shy guy that he once was, I can now hear him talk, see his teeth when he smiles and laugh, heard him sing, even saw him dance. I'm proud to say that I am so pleased to have found a long lost love plus i came to know a new one. I love both the old and the new. Is it TIME that made all my dreams into a reality, maybe? But I believe it is because TIME...has it's mystery...
^nina^
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